--bail me out, im just guilty for falling--

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

f~i may never know whats been missing in my life~f

the beautiful day always let one remembering fondly.
the happy time always let one reluctanting to part with.

if i stop dreaming. 11:59 PM +

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

f~confessions of the rugged doll~f

wherever my life leads me to.
i wish my soul will never be always blue.
with a gentle touch on my broken heart.
the pieces will just shatter into the dark.
heartaches ive brought upon my loved ones and myself.
how i wished i was never bought from the shelf.
tears ive cried and tears ive hold.
should i still believe i am always bold.
lessons learnt and knowledge gained.
no one may understand my feelings of pain.
whatever my life may leads me to.
i wish i could see the light as my life is through..

if i stop dreaming. 7:21 PM +

Friday, December 23, 2005

f~between us, "friends" is never a word. but a promise~f

today, or was it yesterday oready.. 22nd dec noh..
was such a tiring day, and so emotional uh.. lols
holiday is finally here, yet it will still be quite stressful
have about 3-4 projects + some online assignments..
maybe have to plan my time ler, if i want to enjoy too..

so morning i woke up 7+am, so tired..
the day before i didnt study for edeckt, lazy..
even played dota, totally no hope for edeckt ler..
mon..monn..monster kill me uh.. lool
played too much dota ler, influenced by my friends..

and that morning i felt like giving up, dont go school..
but i still had to lah, at least get afew marks or something
so i was on the bus reaching soon, i read my textbook..
really at the last minute, suddenly i understood some stuffs
too bad its really too late, i went in the classroom..
everybody had settled down..

had time to read the questions.. i stoned, how can this be..
i read some stuffs at the last minute, i couldnt understand still
going to start, the angmo examiner had to read instructions
he really started my day with a smile.. he read like machine gun
somemore with his angmo accent, it was kinda funny..
at first everybody got surprised, then some laughed..

i wanted to laugh, but i scared rude.. so i controlled abit
then i saw some people laughed, i laughed abit noh.. lols
start ler, i had no choice.. my mind turned messy..
lols, i really dont wish to repeat any module uh..
so i just anyhow use formulae in, heck care relevant or not..
i just hope arh, really hope.. to get some marks..

after the paper, i turned.. waa so many people left..
but most of them should be gave up de, edeckt suks lah..
morever, nat (top student) was pretty fumed up..
he banged here and there, so scary uh.. he said he dont know
if he dont know, then i really doomed sia.. =s

so anyway, after that went TM de kfc to eat noh..
with winson, winston, shawn, kai, darren, nigel, jasp and manhin
stoopid kfc, i asked for mug yea mug.. the woman said okay okay..
and even asked again, in the end i got same black black drink..
but its coke, arghh.. somemore i nearly didnt get my cheese fries
the auntie sending food told me that fat woman forgot..

lols, if i bad mood arh.. i sure take the coke and scold her..
after that went raiders and played dota noh..
arghh 8+$ neh, played for about 4+hrs.? my heart so pain..
used lich, enchantress then lycanthrope noh.. lost 2 won 1
after that, took bus to punggol there.. then took 88 to bishan

i hadnt eat, hadnt loo.. so i chionged to 7eleven and bought milk
then chionged to toilet, the toilet crowded.. then went to another
after that went up meet the rest to watch kingKong..
quite alot of peeps: gwy, ck, tuck, ron, js, wx, les, igna, vic, iz, kh, kev
then vic didnt watch uh, after that tuu awhile.. we went in noh

hmm, the movie not bad noh.. kinda long nia, 3+hours.?
then got some part quite exciting, some part quite horrible..
and lastly some part quite touching, oww i sobbed..
greedy bastards, only think for themselves.. caused troubles
and so sad, why kong had to die.. he just want to be with ann nia..
whats their damm problems sia.. cant they understand, arghh..

then still got those freaking giant insects and worms.. disgusted me
i really felt so freak out.. i cant imagine really got such living things
lols, and i dont understand why got dinosaurs.. mixed up world
most funny was the dinosaurs all tumbling down.. alot of lame stuffs
overall, its a great movie i guess.. starting part i almost fell asleep nia

so after the movie, we went toilet.. then stood somewhere
dont know doing what, then kev, kh and i went s&k see see..
no nice tee ler eh, last time got alot.. but i was broke uh..
so nevermind, after that went to find the rest at kopitiam..
then had some drinks, and slackked abit uh..

lols, after that they want go up to the carpark or dont know where..
im a very practical person uh, i dont see a need.. i rather go home rest
so i kept insisting i want to go home.. but they all didnt let me..
i kept asking them go up for what, they told me just go up.. zz
hahah, sorry to make you all pek chek.. im a very stubborn person

so i was still insisting on my decision.. then like abit weird noh
why must they insist me of going there.. i didnt have any idea
then the feeling wasnt very good ler, i nearly felt like crying..
err they saw or something, and didnt force ler..
but i still felt kinda low uh..

hmm, after that they surprised me with a cake behind the wall..
and they sang me birthday song, lols.. real surprised, speechless
then that really hitted me, i teared abit..
i wished, i blew the candles and i cut the cake..
kinda paiseh uh, need to cut alot of pieces.. then became ugly

then we ate the fruit cake, i couldnt finish eh..
think they wanted to smash my face with the leftover cake..
i seriously dont wish that to happen, i stayed away.. lols
in the end they aimed les.. =s sorry and thanks uh..
after that i finally get to go home noh.. real tired

thankies all, really appreciates everything you all have done.. ^^

if i stop dreaming. 1:09 AM +

Monday, December 19, 2005

f~as our lifes change, come whatever. we will still be friends forever~f

today i had my term test emaths2 paper arh..
yesterday i reached home yn posted me some questions..
from past year papers, really killer questions noh..
both of us couldnt figure out..

but certainly was a relief arh, wasnt that tough..
was quite straightforward de.. then again, i aim to score 100%
lols, i checked with the pros.. most of our ans are the same

so anyway yesterday (18th dec) was my birthday noh..
im not the type who expect alot lah, just that..
yesterday happen de stuffs really unexpectable, lols..
quite alot of misunderstandings noh..

firstly, kev planned that since it was my birthday..
everybody should go out and eat together..
secondly kh wanted to watch kingKong.. so did kev
but wx going to genting, so not everybody agreed..
and i had to make a decision arh..

then les also want to meet me.. which i didnt have a clue
i thot could meet the rest after that, but i really not sure
what time i can make it.. les didnt say go where do what ma..

so there was some sort of conflict arh..
was like ron and wx knew what les wanted to do..
so they disagreed with kh and kev noh..
then somemore i couldnt decide can go anot..
caused til kh and kev abit disappointed ba, cant go watch..

then kh and kev wanted to go shopping first too..
im not very sure why they didnt go arh..
actually still got fer and iz able to go too ba..
think like very few people, so they didnt go in the end..

then i had to go meet les liao.. i told them to decide first..
and i went off, some survey guy came to talk to me..
asked me if i care about my skin, i said no.. he laughed
then he got nothing to ask liao, he chatted with me..
he actually chatted with me.. it was like so weird noh..

i asked him no more questions liao arh.. he said yes alot..
then he just chatted with me.. asked me for my name
he asked for my number, i rejected..
so then he asked if i got bf.. i said no.. he laughed..

really weird fella.. i was surprised, and he said why no bf..
i said "whats your problem.. do you have a gf.?"
he just laughed and laughed, and then he said no..
then i said "then you still say me" he still laughing
really wth arh.. les lah, so late then come.. lols

zl was there also noh.. then we peiied him go popular buy stuffs
i called kh, he said everybody dont seem to have the mood ler
and i still didnt have a clue what we going to do..
lols, so in the end les and i went town de swensens eat..

eat some apple crumble, banana split and fries..
the apple crumble was nice at first, eat more ler seemed boring
then we couldnt finish it, we played zhong ji mi ma..
kinda funny arh, i lost.. then he also ate with me..
the taste really funny arh.. salty, ketchupy, chocolatey

and really kinda wasted arh, didnt finish everything..
except the banana split, kekek.. it was nice..
so after that we went to walk walk arh.. quite crowded de
and he wanted to buy soccer bet, in the end didnt buy..
cos of the long que arh, then we went cineleisure noh..

we went level9 to see, then wanted to watch movie de..
then he say i still looked kinda upset..
actually i was not noh, i really dont mind de..
its not a matter of whether got people celebrate with me anot..
its not a matter of whether i will be happy anot..

its just that.. why everybody had to be sad..
i felt bad that they couldnt do what they planned..
i appreciated, sure no prob.. but i couldnt give them an answer..
like made them disappointed eh..

think les found it abit guilty too, so he called everybody down..
actually its alright de noh.. the rest did say i just go enjoy
thou i felt bad, he did make me feel glad.. i didnt mind completely
but his thinking was like.. its my birthday.. so i letted him be
lols, i still think its just a day.. another day..
then abit paiseh need to mafan them down.. =s

anyway i appreciated everything arh..
then kh, ron came down.. went to see the Nike shop..
kh couldnt find his M white shirt, so didnt buy..
then went down to the food court, tuck, gwy and fer reached
after that siong and charmaine came and i spoke to charmaine..

very long never see her ler.. hahah had a short conversation
after that they left.. then we decided where to go next..
and we crossed the road and went to heeren..
walked around, while i told fer and gwy the story noh..
kev then called me noh.. he was at tpy

then i was still unsure when we will be heading to tpy..
so i told him to call me later noh..
after that he put down liao, they said go crc..
lols i said take bus, some said taxi, some said mrt..
waa until we reached a mrt, fer then side them..

so in the end we took mrt to tpy.. but nevermind lah..
then kev smsed me with someone's hp.. to contact him..
even thou kev always disappoint me, i never blamed him
i still treat him as my good friend arh..
sometimes i wont want to care either..

its not i want to say arh.. some peers like to bad mouth
when that person is not around.. my poly friends are like that
it really hurts arh.. sometimes i will wonder..
if i were not around, will they insult behind me like that.?

sometimes when one person did something for fun..
the opposite party may take it seriously, then became mad..
really equals to hurting of ties eh..

well well, if i ever say or do anything stoopid and wrong..
do tell me in my face.. im born to take insults, i wont mind..
im not mad, im just disappointed..

so we went to crc noh.. fer, les and me vs tuck, gwy, ron and kh
we -ap, they -random noh..
then we won.. after that fer, gwy and ron took taxi..
and les walked me home.. then all went home noh..
went home did some maths question with yn.. ownage me

then i started to talk to kev.. i asked him about the tagboard stuff
waa i sort of scolded him at first eh.. then i wanted to know why
then he told me he didnt tag, i was so sorry.. he was very upset
i admitted i suspected him, then i listened and talked to him noh..

then he confronted les, i was so sorry eh.. =s
i wasnt as mad lah, i thot that person really joker..
yet it wasnt that simple noh, really hurted him..
its not i want to tell kev de.. its just that i was concerned
everytime people bad mouthed him, i also dont dare tell him..
sure will upset him wa..

but those really quite serious de, i want to know the truth..
ayy, hope wont happen again ba..
whoever that bastard really caused wreckage..

i really wished for world peace and happiness on my cakes..
no joke at all..
anyway i had a great time, friends.. thankies
thankies everybody who wished me too.. =]

if i stop dreaming. 6:07 PM +

Sunday, December 18, 2005

f~photos fade away, but memories always stay~f

yesterday (17th dec) my bros said want celebrate my bday..
so from 11am siong called me eh, dont know why..
i was still sleeping noh, really crazy shyt noh..
around 3pm i left my house, i saw him outside de staircase..
really shocked dao, then i asked him what he doing..
he said he waited since he called me, really wth arh..

and he gave me present, i went to take bus..
he said want pei me go, i said no need noh..
lols then he went home noh.. he had bball match ma..
so i met jane, wc and minghui at tpy noh..
after that go bishan noh, wanted to watch movie.. zs came

the cinema only had chickenLittle, thePromise and kingKong..
then kingKong selling fast arh, so in the end didnt watch arh..
waa they really like to tuu noh.. want eat dont want eat de..
kept walking around to decide, in the end went food court to eat

hmm, after that went PS noh.. caught two winnieThePooh eh
one small and one big de, they spent quite alot of money..
the small one very funny, wc kept trying cannot catch dao..
zs tried one time caught dao ler, then gave me noh..
the big one wc kept for himself noh, then not much luck ler..

oo i was feeling very uncomfortable noh.. i vomitted arh..
then vomitted finish still got want to vomit de feeling eh..
think i had gastric problem arh.. really very very xin ku..
walk also walk til very slow, then headache also..
it was until evening, going to zs house eat ler..
then zs went to bought some medicine..

went to his house ler, he told me the medicine was for me..
hahah first time eat the medicine, one tube de..
alot of small bits inside de, i was quite surprised noh..
had to eat the whole tube at one go eh, lols.. first time ma..
then ate ler, felt better noh.. thanks alot bro.. =D

after that, kaihong, longhui and hanrong reached ler..
then they cooked fried noodles and prepared steamboat..
very heart warming arh, lols all they cook de..
then the fried noodles very funny, tasted like carrot cake..
but its nice arh.. and we watched 40yearOldVirgin wc brought
then siong also came liao, said his team lost by 10+points noh..

so the show quite funny de.. alot of uncensored stuff and vulgars arh..
then after that cut cake noh, fruit cake.. ^^
they also bought me something from Perlini`sSilver..
reminded me of something.. =s
and we took some photos noh, then went home ler..

missed one bus, in the end took taxi noh..
reached home around 12.05 never tio gan, kekek..
opened the box, they bought me dolphin earrings+necklace
yeah i enjoyed and had a great time, thanks alot bros.!

if i stop dreaming. 2:07 AM +

Thursday, December 15, 2005

f~my heart was broken, i thought loving you was out of question~f

today i skipped first lecture and went for psps tut..
some problem solving skill stuff arh, then had to do presentation
hahah, i still remember yesterday night we last min do de..
its a group assignment arh, then i thot of doing the slides myself..

then i think, waa abit zz.. so didnt do..
i asked manhin, he like abit blurr blurr.. dont know what is it about
lols, then lucky james came online.. i was kinda rushing arh
i told them il do slides and description, they think of an example for it
heng we did it quite fast, then i sent to them.. and was freaking relieved

james did the presentation noh, not bad lah..
then he kept saying got throw my face all those, aiyo pass can ler..
this subject no grade no nothing, i just want a P.. lols
then they say about never did much, i did most of it..
so anyway after that was emaths lecture..

the whole bunch of us decided not to go.. cos do revision nia..
then we also decided not to go the two java labs after break..
so altogether we had 4 hours of freetime before our ssmat test..
and guess what.. DOTA again, and CS.. sad seh, yesterday spent 5+$
today spent another 5+$ noh.. about 16 of us went, lecturer sure sad

so the whole gang went to take bus.. the bus came and we ran for it..
then some sort our class has 3 "outsider" ma, so versus them..
they had one friend with them lah.. then we best 4 play with them..
lols, quite a hard game arh.. like kill here and there, quite a long one
and in the end we won arh.. then no game, we played cs ler noh..

after that went for ssmat test ler noh..
oo then very funny arh.. forget who said kai very fat..
then kai squeezed his tummy and asked "you got anot.?" to nat..
nat and nigel dont have.. then nat suddenly point the "outsider" girl
and said "why you didnt ask her.?" lols, really wth noh..

the girl stared very fierce sia.. scary noh, aiyo very poor thing..
she quiet quiet sat there so innocent then suddenly got shot at..
ayy, dont know why they like to mock others.. im not that fierce nia
actually her situation was cos got one time arh..
that girl said she think shes the prettiest.. then took pics of herself
using other people's hp, lols.. then they started to pick on her ler

so anyway the test wasnt as hard as i thot eh, was straightforward..
and i manage.. for the first time in my life.. to do it myself..
with some guidiance from the lecturer arh..
lols, doesnt seem like a test de noh.. the lecturer told us our mistakes..
told us we did correct all those de.. i think he scared we cannot make it

=] my mugging holiday..

if i stop dreaming. 9:37 PM +

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

f~then i saw my reflection saying please dont let this go~f

yesterday night after one dota match, i let my bro play..
then i went to sleep, nice sia.. usually he play very noisy..
and i cant sleep.. yesterday i really slept, i was very tired..
kekek, was sneezing non stop also yesterday..

anyway today was quite a short day arh.. two labs nia, and cds..
then both labs have lab tests noh.. i was late for java lab noh..
and i thot tomorrow then java test, lucky it was a open book test..
kinda irritating noh.. i manage to do the TextListener shyt..
then i thot i finished ler, i was so happy.. i raised up my hand..

alot of people quite surprised arh, lols i was the first.. =s
then the lecturer came, omg noh.. i forget got button..
kinda paiseh arh.. so i debug and debug, i couldnt get.!
so irritating.. got one example on it, and i didnt take down notes..
waa so many examples i got take down, why that example didnt..
really disappointed sia.. hope can pass lah, at least..

then after that was dfund2 lab test.. i didnt really prepare for it..
whao i was relieved that the lab was straightforward arh.. quite easy
oh ya, yesterday got back my dfund2 quiz result..
just becos didnt state "output" i got minus 1 mark.. arghh heartache
but at least lah, i got around the marks i was expecting..

so was happy noh.. hope i can score well..
but arghh, i can score well for two subjects.. so what sia..
the two other subjects im really in total shyt arh.. zz
really scared noh, i dont want to repeat any module eh..

blahh, then after that lab test.. got about 2-3 hours break..
james, nigel, shawn, jasp, winson and me went raiders to play cs..
quite fun noh, but they kept using artic arh.. so zhun eh
then cannot escape from it de.. i dont even know how to use
i only know how to use the B-4-2 terrorist de scout.. lols

after that darren, kai and winston came, and we played cs noh..
awhile later, we played dota noh..
nigel and shawn are beginners arh, then we team up noh..
my team got james, winston and shawn noh.. 4v5

then opposite team all use their main hero sia..
jasp used naix, winson used gondar, darren used treant..
kai used soulkeeper then darren asked nigel to use death phophet..
waa, i thot will lose noh.. then i just use lyncanthrope..
james used bone, winston used his venomancer, shawn used riki..

riki very cute, play til quite some time he still level1..
then he kept smoke screen noh, also good arh..
our lane got treant and death arh.. then i kept aiming death.. =x

then winston lane got gondar and naix, he not bad noh..
his venomancer really strong arh.. heng naix cannot farm..
i really very zz with naix noh, see naix is confirm die de..
then james also not bad, thou he only know how to use bone..
hahah, then i first time get 4 kills at one time.. triple kill, triple kill

abit paiseh arh actually, then i always go chiong..
chase til kill liao, in the end got killed also.. oww..
venomancer also beyond godlike, bone also unstoppable..
i gave my wolf powerthreads, mom, basher, mkb, heart, sacred relic..
then going to end got radiance noh.. hahah then got killed by firebush
90secs then can come out.. haven come out, gg ler..

then went back school, wanted to attend ssmat extra lesson de..
in the end, dont have time.. azz wipe the chair nia, have to go to cds liao
hahah, 4+ i zhao noh cos got break ma.. very tired arh, very sian also
then walked around and waited for zheqi til 5+ then he dismiss..
zz my hp keep on spoiling like that.. insert sim card shyt..

want change phone, dont want change phone too.. cos alot of stuffs inside
lols, somemore also cant find another phone similiar to mine ler..
the keypad is good and the phone is pretty.. hah next time then see how ba..

oh ya, later got star idol.. i quite enjoy watching it arh, some act really good..
then see my friend, then will think kinda funny noh..
that time he asked me to support by joining his fan club i think..
at first really weird arh, like know him not long.. suddenly he became famous
thou i never support by smsing or calling, i support by watching noh..

so tomorrow got one test, next day got lab test..
monday got test, wednesday got two tests, thursday got last paper..
woots, so many tests uh.. good luck to all having tests~ ^^
happy holidays and seasons greetings soon..

if i stop dreaming. 7:24 PM +

Monday, December 12, 2005

f~i think its amazing, the way how love can set you free~f

saturday (10th) - went my buddy's wedding.. went at 7 started at 8
cos everybody was tuuing and late arh.. =s still took taxi..
so that night the bride is pretty, the groom is handsome.. =]
it was held at some vegetarian restaurant at upp serangoon rd..
the food not bad eh, thou some are not meat.. they still taste nice..

and we had yakult (another brand of vitagen) as dessert.. lols
very unique noh.. we were kinda expecting some nice dessert..
when suddenly yakult was served.. then we just laughed noh..
i sat with amylia, eric, andrew, ailing, yen and some guy..
seen before but dont remember name.. kekek..

then eric was saying alot of people wearing masks..
in the means that everybody acted happy ba..? not sure..
and it ended quite fast, about 2 hours..
then we had photoshots noh.. dont know the guy will send me anot
later make me wait, never send me i sure go find him.. lols

sunday (11th) - afternoon went to orchard noh.. walked around
like shopping noh, but for me.. i was window shopping.. kekek
something like outing sia, just walk around and talk talk..
oo then we went to some coffee bean to slack arh..
i dont take coffee, so les and i went to have ice cream noh..
i chose pistacho flavour and black sesame flavour.. ^^ nice nice.!

and we took quite afew pictures noh..
then also got do boliao stuff arh.. -.= hahah, real embarrassing..

and now, its monday oready.. today was quite a happening day..
early morning went school, i wrote my feelings in mms..
lols but i unsure want send anot, err.. nevermind about that..
so i reached my bus stop ler, i squeezed through the crowds..
then when i wanted to take out my bus pass.. omg lah, dont know where

bobian, i went back to my seat and find.. very cham if lost
then the guy beside me helped me find too..
he even plucked out the seat noh, dirtyed his hands.. =s
so sorry arh.. and quite embarrassing.. some people helped also
then they asked something, i didnt hear properly arh..

and the guy said he will help me find and return to me..
then i nodded and alighted the next bus stop noh..
i went down, i started to feel around my pants arh..
then omg noh, i put it in my left pocket.. lols so paiseh arh
i didnt dare to take out arh, oready very embarrassing..
gave so much trouble on the bus.. =s

so fast forward, during break i went to toilet noh..
did my business.. then ate blueberry cheese cake and drank milk..
then i went to dfund2 lecture ler.. i dozed off sia..
really boring topic ba, kekek.. then i dreamt noh..
i dreamt i fell from the escalator, and woke up in shock..
so paiseh.!! nobody saw i guess, but the lecturer was looking at me..

lols, then james beside me also just right woke up.. i told him noh..
then he said sometimes will like that de.. forgot what ler..
and i turned to see what kai drew, nothing much.. then turned back
kai like said "she angry ler".. lols i really didnt notice eh..
then he started erasing something, then i saw.. my name.. =s
he gave me an ugly face.. sad lah, everytime bully me..

blahh, then nevermind.. i was telling kai i really didnt notice..
then my stomach super pain.. i kept thinking why so pain..
lols, cannot be i needa go do business noh.. cos done ler
then i think is it cheese cake + milk then stomachache..
really not sure arh.. until the lecture finish then realised felt wet..

lols then i think i know ler.. went to toilet and check.. really menses
arghh, dirtyed my pants abit arh.. but my friend said cannot see..
so its a suay and heng day arh..
i had full marks for my emaths2 test noh, so happy..
but i also worried for those who didnt score well eh..

then emaths2 tut ended early, so left early..
and saw weiliang and his gf noh.. awhile later, their bus arrived first..
then they left, then my bus behind noh..
went to meet les, kev, wx, kel and ron to have dinner..
after that saw kh, then we played dota..

the last game not bad noh.. kh was saying he want use spiritbreaker..
then -ar liao, we see see.. i tio spiritbreaker sia, so heng..
he was so happy like that, lols then he exchanged comp with me..
i used enchantress noh.. yeahh first time use til so lihai eh..
the other time i used, i still blurr blurr.. the hero not bad noh..

so thats the end.. really tired sia..

if i stop dreaming. 11:34 PM +

Saturday, December 10, 2005

f~i may not be e perfect one. but to be sure, il always care for you~f

yesterday was a long day.. i had school from 8am to 1pm de..
but i skipped two hours lab, and went at 10 noh..
too bad that lab got take attendance then can leave..
this lab cannot skip liao, kekek i didnt go two times ler..

anyway then 10am went for the test.. i lazy bring textbook
cos i brought emaths1 for maths clinic arh.. bag very heavy ler
but after school i still had to go celebrate zheqi bday.. then was unsure
hahah, then yn said he not going.. then i think i also not noh..
hmm hope the test i could get full marks arh.. kekek

then after that left two lectures noh.. edeckt = sure die
i dont know a single shyt about it.! i dont know term test how arh..
lols, and i think i was lucky to just pass my edeckt test noh..
then i really like dfund2 alot sia, really fun and easy subject.. ^^
i like the lecturers who teach dfund2 also.. just see them happy arh

anyway after school walking together with the rest..
we were at some corner, then got shadow like running very fast..
suddenly i got scared, lols.. then winson behind also got stunned..
kinda funny arh.. the person haven appear i suddenly stunned dao eh..
dont know how come.. i really got frightened suddenly noh, kekek
then those infront said the guy was running in zig zag crazily..
with hands waving around, hahah.. -.=

blahh, anyway then went home played dota with them noh..
they also created a hamachi network, hahah..
so sad noh, i lost in both games.. 3v2 also lose, 2v3 also lose..
really felt like noob ler, hahah.. but nevermind lah, just a game..
anyway why play dota.? whats the purpose..
every game restarts, sometimes will get buay song.. =s
but luckily we usually laugh ourselves out after that noh..

so after the games, i went to city hall noh.. i reached abit late nia..
sy was the first.. then she bought present liao, so i went to see see
actually could buy something from ig'sHeaven, but dont know why gone..
so sad, then in the end couldnt find anything and went back..
then diana, mj and weijoo also reach ler.. left zheqi himself, lols..
hmm, he looked quite charming without specs arh..

and we went to raffles place shopping centre to see any restaurant..
he only wants to eat at restaurant ma.. at first he had Petals in mind de..
but he scared expensive to us, in the end we still went arh..
Petals is a Shatec restaurant noh.. not bad sia, high class restaurant neh..
their service must be very good noh, hahah make you feel pampered..
i ate til very happy arh.. the food looked good and tasted good..

it started with bread then appetizer, soup, main course, dessert, tea then petit four..
its like cant wait til the next come de noh.. have to eat finish then next will come..
woots, hahah zheqi jiu shi like that de.. know where got the best food, lols..
then we were figuring out what is petit four..
err, i said petit four was four more times the whole package.. hahah kinda lame arh
then mj said petit four meant the four dishes.. but actually..
petit four is something like small chocolates and pastry for us.. ^^

after our dinner, we still have christmas cookies noh.. so cute eh..
got one gingerbread man and a christmas tree de.. later after lunch go eat =D
then after that took photos noh, later i post some of them here..
hmm, after that i left ler noh.. went to crc see see them..
then went to my pri school friend's grandpa de funeral thingy..
it was at my house downstairs arh.. in the morning i saw, but didnt notice anything

then went there, left my friend's father and one auntie talk to me and my mama..
the rest went to sleep ler.. didnt get to see my friend sia, so long didnt see her..
last time we very good de noh.. she was my neighbour and pri school mate..
kekek, abit blurr blurr type de.. then likes to laugh.. then always go her house play
after i shifted house and graduated ler, like didnt get to see her ler.. =s

blahh, then the grown ups advise me before midnight go home noh..
cos i tonight got wedding dinner arh.. my buddy de..
dont know need to wear very nice de anot, lols i no formal wears arh..
had to wear what my closet have noh.. hehh, then go there see how it is like..
hope hes happy..

if i stop dreaming. 12:48 PM +

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

f~if i were to die, will you let me die in your arms~f

hii, i have afew mins to spare before doing my project..
so i came to blog..
yesterday i had a headache sia, dont know why..
played quite afew dotas last night.. arghh

anyway yesterday i 2pm went school, for 3hours..
today i 2pm, went school for 2 hours only.. the test was easy
freaking sicked, woke up got nonsense..
mama didnt cook anything, so i decided to eat bread..
then she dont let me eat.. say only tea time then can eat

she asked me go out eat.. thats fine arh
but which logic says cannot eat bread sia.. so i argued
thou theres no point, its really ridiculous lah..
waa then everytime i argue with her, i want to cry sia..
this time i didnt cry, i went back to my room cool down
after that i left noh.. i rather dont eat went school..

but my heart really very arghh.. i felt super low..
then i bought sweets to eat, wrote down how i felt in mms..
sometimes i will write how i felt in mms then save it noh..
then after i felt alright liao, i will delete it..
felt like crying while typing on the bus, but only eyes wet abit..
the uncle beside me kept turning over ma.. see outside scenery

anyway these few days really like lotsa nonsense eh..
yesterday jasp smsed me mushy stuff, and i didnt have his number
but the way he typed really like pulling my leg noh.. too mushy
so didnt take it seriously, didnt bother much about it..
just that it was quite funny.. then went home kai told me noh..
he said he asked jasp to cheer me up de..

err, thanks for the concern.? i actually didnt know i look sad..
i did feel abit low arh, but i did act normally arh..
people talk to me, i still got talk.. only nonsense then i turn away
then another was this morning.. i was still sleeping arh..
someone smsed me, then i was still blurred i deleted it..

until i went school, i remembered someone smsed me..
and i remembered what my brotha told me.. -.=
he said he want to surprise me with a bikini on my birthday..
really wth arh, it was seriously shocking..
then james suddenly ask if i were scared of him or uncomfortable with him
and told me if he did do anything wrong can tell him.. =s
well, i admit im avoiding.. sometimes i rather be left alone arh

i really cant figure out how come these few days like that..
abit funny, abit weird, abit ridiculous.. ya.?
then im really confused not sure arh.. =s confused and scared

if i stop dreaming. 5:51 PM +

Sunday, December 04, 2005

f~my heart keep falling all over again and again~f

hii, well i more and more see buay song my blog arh..
dont really know why arh.. like kinda sian with it..
want to change layout everything, but lazy..
maybe one day free then change everything.. ^^

anyway very tired nowadays, couldnt sleep well..
everytime got people disturb my sleep, arghh..
anyway yesterday de yesterday (friday) was a long day..
morning woke up early in the morning 6.20 went school..
took bus, went to lab.. graded lab.. woots..

then my mentee sat beside me, i abit stress..
lols cos he kept looking at me arh..
i dont know arh.. people look at me i sure know de..
then i will have an uneasy feeling, so i dont like people stare
usually i will check if the person is staring, then look away..
i think people stare abit irritating noh.. lols

anyway then first part of the lab i can do, behind i couldnt..
then i bobian had to copy answers, hahah..
oh ya that day was 12th dec also, james' birthday..
i could see he quite sad noh.. i hadnt wish him that day..
felt abit bad for him noh.. i wanted to buy him a lil something de
then one day he provoked me, i decided not to..
but on that day, i felt really bad arh.. zz

1pm we finished school, but i had maths mentoring at 1.30
so i couldnt pei james arh, can tell hes quite disappointed..
seems like nobody celebrated for him noh, poor thing..
then i went up, registered and waited in the classroom..
hmm, i got a 21yr old girl to teach.. she approached me

shes matured and cute cute de.. i like her very much arh..
kekek, she very keen at learning noh.. and quite hardworking..
when i forget some formulae and on how to do a question..
she said nevermind take your time..
really great, gave me the confidence to teach her noh..

starting i really abit stressed.. didnt know want to go anot..
scully really got diisiao people kept asking me questions..
or didnt understand what im trying to teach.. real jialat noh..
luckily what i taught her, she understood..
hahah, she even told her friends i teach good and clicked to her
then after 4pm we chatted noh.. as i was waiting for yn..

hahah he had a hard time arh.. his mentee kept want to do gaussian
do til he also got confused.. lols, then they both wore green..
like couple noh, somemore the girl small size he big size.. =x
then announcement said 4.30 got fire drill..
we before 4.30 left noh.. took cab with yn, as he was rushing..

hmm, after that walked home.. like think of some stuff..
then til today i still dont know why and how my leg hurt.. lols
anyway now better, wont walk like bai kar ler..
went home ler, after that went to meet john, fer, gwy, flo and wx..
i really tired noh.. then watched people dancing and cheerleading
it was a crowd sia, then cheerleading only can see when people fly..

hmm then iz came, kev and tuck also came.. johnson left..
we went to watch movie noh, really sian half..
at first discuss quite long, some dont want watch this that..
lols, in the end we watched chicken little..
quite a cute show noh, then some part quite touching..

oww, i sobbed.. kekek its about trust between father and son..
rest of the show is really cute noh.. alot of old songs.. =D
"oh dont go breaking my heart" "no i wont go breaking your heart"
still got "so tell me what you want, what you really really want"
lols, awesome songs..

after that went crc.. arghh.. =s
met keyou, zhenleong and lun there.. keyou fat ler.. =x
i didnt want to play de noh.. but uneven number.. 9 people
then they said til i like bobian sia.. lols so i played..
i thot they 3 together quite pro, with tuck and fer..
in the end with iz, wx, kev and gwy.. we won them
kekek, i first time crystal maiden beyond godlike sia..

after that went home noh.. tired tired..
almost whole day outside eh.. wished james happy birthday last min
sometimes i like to do that.. kekek
then saw him online, he talked to me.. woots..
he started asking me to rest, heart pain for me..
really kinda weird weird noh..

then he asked if could catch a movie together.. his treat
hmm, i dont mind lah.. but i wont truthful to myself
firstly i dont want give wrong impression..
secondly i felt as if i was pitying him..
so nono, cannot like that de..

yupps, then yesterday (saturday) went out again..
tired tired.. i wanted to go cine noh, join some lucky draw..
then fer had tuition til 4, so went with ron and yn first..
hahah, they were at cold storage quite some time eh..
by the time i reached there, they were looking at the different beers

really funny peeps.. then went to some section..
gosh, i dont understand why so many types of condoms..
what the hell is for lubricating gel.. lols and i never touch any before
no way am i gonna touch them.. i see liao also will paiseh noh..
after buying some stuff, we went to take bus to cine noh..

went there, put my lucky draw form.. really hope i could get
and it was a pity i didnt bring my lime magazine..
could have gotten a goodie bag with a limited edition figurine.. arghh
after that walked around, wanted to watch movie..
in the end decided fer reach first then say.. so we went up level9
real awesome place.. its a big lan shop, with good computers..
with xbox, nice lightings, overall its a swell place lah..

then we slacked there for quite some time.. hahah fer was abit slow
after she reached, we went to eat.. talked some rubbish too..
then headed to cuppage, wanted to play 2v2 noh..
reached there, saw mel with his two friends.. then played together
fer like said they quite pro, then we 4v3 with them..
then one darren came in, didnt remember why the decision was to 5v3

then we won of cos.. then after that they left noh..
hmm, after that two small boys want play with us 4v2..
woots, nearly lost sia.. one of them is pro, one of them is newbie
then the pro one got nerubian weaver, so pro noh..
first time see nerubian weaver so pro.. kekek

we played 2v1 in two lanes ma.. then fer and yn with the newbie..
they kept killing the boy.. the pro boy said "dont feed" something something
then i thot he saying to his friend dont feed fer and yn..
fer asked who.? then the boy said his friend lah.. so its dont feed on newbie
then we said play game jiu shi yao try kill here and there de..
then do what.? stand around or let him kill meh.. boliao sia..

hmm, and three people also cannot kill weaver noh..
in the end was weaver triple kill.. arghh sadness
the boyboy still so xialan de, i bought gem.. dropped he dared me buy another
waa shocking, i said "waa dare me sia".. he gave me a "jk"..
think he want xialan also cannot noh, later yn or ron box him one punch =x

lols, ron still chat with him.. the boy asked if any of us play in bnet..
ron said he played barbie dolls only, still full collection sia..
very funny noh.. we laughing our way while playing, even died..
but yn good arh, he farmed.. and still know how to buy for armour
only yn can conquer weaver noh, kekek..

after that the two boys lost and left noh.. i asked why never say bbyex de..
they said the boy talked so xialan, still can face us.. =s
then got quite afew people said want play with us.. they 5 people
wx haven reach, so we said later noh.. hahah
and they went to eat.. wx came liao we went back down.. not much space

then we went to find a shoe sale somewhere.. forgotten where
cos yn go throw away the leaflet.. -.= hahah then we walked around noh
wanted to play at cine, i couldnt stay out late.. wx like not happy.. =s
after much decision, we went to crc noh..
saw the "awesome stuff" guy, chris, rox, bl, cm, dom, ray there..
really qiao arh..

then blah blah, starting fer owned them sia..
then comp hang, then i left ler.. ^^ fer you owe me my 10$ =x

tomorrow will be a better day.. everyday will be a sunny day

if i stop dreaming. 12:22 AM +